“When I was green in judgment, cold in blood, To say as I said then!” Antony And Cleopatra Act 1, scene 5, 67–75
The writer’s block begins where my courage ends. “To say as I said then!” Once, very long ago I wrote whatever came to mind. There are times I wish I could just write every thought that comes to mind and honestly get it all out on paper (screen), but I am not so green anymore. I know that scribblings have consequences. I don’t even trust the hard copy written journal as fragile as life is these days. Once the thoughts are on paper, you really do not have control of who will read those words, how they’ll react or where they will be shared.
Are my words bad, dangerous, hurtful, or hateful? I seriously doubt that they are, but they are intensely private and as long as they stay locked inside, I control them. I only let them out when they behave on the leash and don’t run wild.
Last year I read a dead woman’s journal. That she held on to those journals nearly 60 years after they were written is one thing that surprises me most.
So, my salad days are over and all that is left are a few sparse scraps of cryptic poetry whose meaning remains under control.
This is how I interpret the Daily Prompt for today’s Blogging 101 assignment.
It started simply enough. I think. A staff member asked if she could have an aquarium on her desk. Instead of coming directly to me, she asked the Office Naysayer, who took pleasure in saying, “No.” Who then came to me, chuckling at the thought that someone might want to *gasp* bring a fish into the office.
I can be a bit dense at time, which said Naysayer would claim to be an understatement. So, when the issue was brought to my attention, I didn’t quite see the problem. I said, “Well, sure… why not? As long as she doesn’t leave for vacation without taking the fish with her.” OMGosh…
Next day, Naysayer prints out and highlights the company policy that says, “No domestic animals.” I’m thinking… ‘Seriously?’
So, I go to [large chain pet store] and buy a betta fish. I’ve seen those little guys in tiny bowls before.
Everyone (except Naysayer) seems to like the little guy. I wasn’t thrilled because every day his water was murky. It looked so unhealthy and I really didn’t want to be a fish-failure. I went back to [large chain pet store] to find a more appropriate fish tank… which is what started the next part of my journey. I found the neatest little fishtank, just perfect for the top of my desk.
That made me start thinking bigger… what about something bigger? At home? Why do I have a quarter acre and still spend [OMGosh so much] money at the grocery store?
Now, I found the neatest company…. they sell everything I need to start my own backyard fish-farm / garden / someday small business?